S331. Kiss from a hellish angel

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All stories about soul love are about beautiful thoughts, nice feelings and longing for each other. All those stories are as beautiful as in a fairytale with a good ending.

But my story is the opposite. I ended up in a fairy tale with the worst scenario that can ever exist. One in which I ended up in hell and caught by the son of matchstick. He attracts me, I fall in love. I live my life with my head in the clouds.
My heart beats faster because of the music he whispers in my ear. I float in his dreams, listen to his sweet words, it feels nice, kiss him and just want to be with him. Love makes blind and I lose control of everything I am doing. I struggle to come back to reality. It drives me crazy! It exhausts me. Both physically and mentally. My whole body hurts, except that sore arm with an open wound is healing. My head is one big chaos.

I want it to stop. But it doesn’t work, because all the puzzle pieces from life come together, in which teachers pointed to the one man who will be destined for me. How sweet he would be to me, full of passion, how intelligent he is, how romantic, how brilliant he is, how much further he is than me. Who now determines my destiny? Am I right?

My life was back in order, but now I am trapped here again. It spoils my appetite. I’m stuck, but I want to go. I wish the first kiss was never.