S070. He taught me to be myself


We met in a local cafe, we looked at each other, started talking and stopped. It was all friendly and absolutely no decorating or seducing. It was obvious that he brought me home and slept next to me and woke up, just warmth and affection, not sex. I had just been in divorce for 10 months and he was single.

I have experienced soul love as a matter of course. Eventually we got a relationship that lasted 2 years, it was great. He was someone I could be with 24 hours a day without getting bored. He knew my feeling, his own , we needed few words to understand each other. Although the relationship is over, when we meet, we feel this in advance and that attraction is there again, we both (it is now 2 years left) have no new relationship, because we unwittingly seek the same. Because it has passed in a violent way, he has hurt me so much that it has been cut into my feeling and deeply touched my soul, we can talk about it well, because despite everything that happened, we remain 2 magnets, even though my parents and friends don’t understand. Only my best friend, when he and I are talking together, sees that there is something incomprehensible between us and that it is such a shame! I myself see it as a beautiful vase that was worth so much, but has fallen into 100 pieces, we would both like to glue it, but it will never be watertight again. Such a shame ………….
It was an unprecedented love affair that was perfect in this area, both sexual and warmth, affection, respect, it was REAL LOVE.

Obstacles in our relationship were that our lives were too different, I single mother of a son of 2, he a backpacker and full in the nightlife, this eventually broke down, he could not take the responsibility. I wanted a stable home situation.
Now we have friendship, this is not satisfactory for him, as soon as he sees me he is back in my life, then he calls me, sometimes it turns into a sex. Which we both do not regret afterwards. I just can’t have a relationship with him anymore, because he dropped me like that. I know that he was very much in trouble with himself at the time, but this was no reason to hurt me to the depths of my soul.

What my soul love has brought me is that he has taught me to be myself , he has helped me through a very difficult period of divorce and taught me to stand up for myself and express my feelings. The great thing is that if he talks to me now, sees how I have changed and indeed stays close to my own feelings and no longer goes into a relationship with him, friendship is enough for me and knowing that I can always count on him in good and bad times. I experienced this after an accident in the Czech Republic in February 2005, he felt in the Netherlands that something was wrong with me and when I was out of danger, I just wanted to call him, but something prevented me.
What I find most special about soul love is the story of my accident in the Czech Republic and our special encounter and the way in which our relationship ended and that we regained friendship despite everything.
If he is somewhere in my neighborhood I feel that, he has it too. We just have to look at each other.

The eroticism we had had passed without shame, passed all boundaries , made love with each other, without you thinking, unfortunately I have never experienced this again and neither has he. Knowing each other’s body through and through in a natural way.

Our relationship had ended as my only true great love, too bad I had to find him in bed with another woman, after which I smashed all his windows out of pure love. Only then did he realize that I really loved him, unconditionally and that it would no longer be okay. How could he doubt my love?

Actually I am looking for soul love again, knowing that I will not find it anymore. Although I have this feeling a bit at the moment with a man. However, he was hurt by his wife and best friend about 1.5 years ago and is definitely not ready for a relationship and puts his energy into his work, son and circle of friends. He does indicate that he likes me very much, but a relationship is difficult at the moment … He also admits that he does not dive from one relationship to another. A period of being alone is good.

Soul love is beautiful to experience, I am happy that I have experienced this experience and that he will always remain a part of my life. Don’t know how this works out if I ever get a relationship again. I have learned that I want a pure, sincere relationship, I don’t go for less and I prefer to stay alone.

My tip is; if you can experience it, enjoy it 1000%, it is so beautiful.