Q1422. Twinflame or life lesson?


In 2017 I moved, together with my husband and two children. I was not happy in our marriage for a while, but every time I thought it would change. Maybe a move to a neighborhood will do us good. That was indeed so, we got more social contacts, and I felt better, but not in my marriage. I got in very good contact with my neighbor, who lived two houses away. She was officially married to a woman, but that relationship was over , only on paper. I heard from her what her ex-wife was, and she never spoke well about her. I saw her ex-wife every two weeks when she came to fetch the children and from our first meeting I thought she had something … there was something that really bothered me about her. I felt that I had to stay away from her, why didn’t I know then.We talked to each other when she came to fetch the children, and I noticed that every time I saw her I felt it deep in my stomach. One day she was sitting with my neighbor, and then we talked about music , that played a very big part in our lives, and we couldn’t stop talking. Just one morning I heard her coming into the street because the music was so loud, I sent her a message on messenger and then it was started.we sent more and more messages to each other and tried to meet each other more and more “by accident”, so I just went for a coffee with my neighbor to see her. falling in love fell like a bomb, suddenly very violent, very deep I even stepped out of my marriage. I could not describe what she released in me, this went much deeper than falling in love,this seemed to be destined !!! we sent every moment of the day, she sat with me every night, we didn’t need words because we understood each other without words, we finished each other’s sentences and could no longer live without each other.we both didn’t work more if we were not together, even reported us sick at work to be together!
Then there was a huge setback. In the past she had done something criminal for which she was punished now, she actually had to go to jail, but she got an ankle bracelet. if only she was 8 to 12 outside the week before she got it, she suddenly became very aloof with me, and the contact very superficial. I do not know what it is, but I can not get rid of her, it seems like she lives in me, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, she sits in me. I suddenly see her name everywhere, and suddenly I feel so lost without her, it seems that I have lost a part of myself.
She said that she finds contact with me very difficult because suddenly I have come very hard and very close, she suddenly feels herself very small and I can play her and she is not used to it. I feel her around me, feel her in me, but am so scared that she doesn’t want me anymore. She has had a difficult life and wants to close chapters first, she says. If this were my twinflame, or soulmate, and it was destined, she would still return to me, or did she come my way as a life lesson?