Q1376. Letting go or casual contact?


In June 2013 I was on a city trip with a couple of girlfriends in a French city. When we went for lunch in the afternoon, I was struck by lightning by the waiter. We started talking and agreed to meet in the evening. He asked for my phone number and called me in the evening after work. We had a fantastic night together. A physical attraction like I had never felt before. He left home early in the morning (is married and 8 years younger than me) and I too returned home. I was overwhelmed, madly in love, but I also felt guilty. I’m married too. (have a nice relationship and want to keep it that way). I thought it would stay that way but he contacted me again soon. I could no longer eat or sleep, I could no longer focus, very intense. We met several times that summer until the last contact of one moment ended in a conflict. Dazed and confused, I stayed behind. Every contact was broken. (social media, telephone). Months later I dared to contact me again. It remained with just friendly contact. I could never really forget him and often thought of him, also often sent positive thoughts to him. Last year I was back in town, I told him and came to see each other for fifteen minutes. I was happy to hear that everything went well and left it at that. I could have released him. Until he contacted me again via social media two months ago. The contact of the past was quickly taken up again and we arranged an appointment in addition to the physical attraction I felt very much in our conversation that our band went much further than just the sexual (I felt from the first meeting). After a few weeks of nice contact I felt that he was withdrawing again but I ignored the signals (I wanted it so hard that it lasted) of course it came to conflict again (he fears his feelings and other problems and I fear to lose him) I was crazy about that rejection and putting on. I really went very deep and didn’t have any feeling for a few days. That is why I searched the net and ended up on this site. Which taught me a lot about myself (ego, fear of rejection, impatience, control, …). ) I have sent a message that putting on and repelling is very hard for me and wants to leave it at that. He let me know that he is also going through a difficult time (he has been out of work for months) and that he has no energy / feeling bad and I have to look for nothing else. we have just talked further but since a week I hear nothing more. I don’t know what to do. Let him go and wait or continue to communicate in a casual way?

Answer 1
your heart. Ultimately it is about getting closer to yourself and dealing with it consciously.