S026. Outside of my children I find that soul love is the most wonderful thing in my life


We talked on the phone for a year because I looked after a child who went to a special school and his family has a taxi company and he was on the phone regularly because I needed to know those times. We had never seen each other in that year, but we had spoken. We both had a relationship; he married and I cohabiting. One day I had to go to the hospital for surgery, I went by train and went back, but it was a bit late already; 7:00 pm. I think I order a taxi I got him on the phone. He said; I’ll come and get you, I want to know who’s behind that phone voice. Done so to speak. We saw each other. I didn’t look it, I weighed 104 kilos, then he said to Jesus what are you beautiful, and I thought wow this is it. Two hours of talking, I said I have to go in now, he said no, you sit still and turned off the intercom of the taxi and closed the door that I had already opened. We talked for another hour and then I really had to go inside. We meet each other precisely when we both experienced a crisis situation in our relationships. We both missed the same thing in a relationship but we have never made love together. Well held together that felt so safe that I have never had anyone. We talked on the phone for many hours together. That lasted about 4 years and then he and his family went on a skiing holiday. And something very bad happened there, he had been huddled against a tree and got into a coma for a few weeks, but fortunately came out reasonably well, but his character changed a lot. Since then he has seen me standing one time and not again the next time and well seven years later both of our relationships still do not dissolve together I miss his presence terribly and I still want him. Nobody can touch him, I feel a piece of emptiness that I cannot describe. I just want him and it has been like that for seven years. I hope someday we come together. I have the feeling that we have to finish something together.
My partner at the time understood it of course because I was not on 1 level with my ex, but of course he is sorry because he lost me.
I experienced the soul contact as if we were 1, I still have that. I am still very sad about this. It feels like a piece is being pulled out of your heart.
My soul love and I had an intense platonic relationship. If one wanted a love affair, the other didn’t want it and vice versa. We don’t have a partner relationship together now, but he doubts, then he wants to and then not. But I can’t give him up, that’s how it feels. I feel that there is more for us. I wait for him.
The biggest obstacle we encountered is that we were both not yet ready for each other and first had to finish our own tasks with our relationships and personal tasks. And only then can they come together.
What soul love has brought me is that I now know what true soulmate is and I have never had that with someone else. So I’ll never go for less. The most special thing was that we felt each other perfectly without saying that you know you belong together. At least spiritually.
I can’t describe it well, but when we get together everything is so pure.
Outside of my children I find that soul love is the most wonderful thing in my life.

What I also want to say is; never rely on the feelings of others. What you feel is the purest thing there is.