Q1286 Why do I do this?


For a while I have been stuck with my behavior, my twin knows what I feel for him. And I am struck by the fact that I behave very differently when I am with him with several around us. I dare not look at him , I feel more and more uncomfortable and want to flee. I also often slam shut don’t really know what to say, etc. And when I say something, I think ‘so hey, what a stupid remark’. For his part, I also feel things. But I am a bit aloof because he is married. I do not want to be an intruder at all, also because I like his wife. I only know that she feels it. Recently I feel looks like she wants something to me My twin and I are so different and feel so good and familiar when we are two, but still I can’t look him in the eye for long and only when he talks to me,as soon as it is quiet I can no longer look. What can I do about this uncomfortable thing. I am in the way of myself enormously, but I feel him looking. While I do nonchalantly and go talk to someone next to me or something. not a pleasant behavior. And it just seems to get worse than it was. Actually, I can only close myself a bit through the looks around me. And the ego that says ‘he is married so stay away’. worried that if I really open myself he will be shocked because that has already happened. As a result of which he blocked me and as if suddenly I was not special to him, while before that he made something very different feel, notice, etc. I let go but I see him regularly but is for my own growth. But I feel increasingly worse. From the week I saw him and it was also very uncomfortable,but there is an urge or something like needing to make love and cuddle with him, and it is not possible. This is also my pure impotence. But energetically we have done it a number of times, his soul draws towards me enormously .Only the last few weeks it is also less energetic contact seems. Someone tips the tip ‘just not see him is not there due to circumstances

Answer 1
If you were a man I would think my twinflame had written this! Recognizable. Why do you act like this and feel so uncomfortable? Because you are very aware that your twinflame can see right through you when he sees you. But do not forget that you can also do that with him and he is just as aware of that. That explains why he does love again and then again aloof. What you can do about it is as follows: Love yourself and give yourself some respite. Don’t blame yourself for your behavior as in “what am I doing stupid”. No, accept that you feel uncomfortable and therefore say stupid things in your eyes. Then let it go. See that he also says and does “stupid” things. Everyone does that. Moreover, you always see things much worse and bigger than others. Then you can try when you will see it, to ground in advance. You imagine that you are connected with a cord to the interior of the earth, firmly anchored but still free to move. Then you put yourself in your mind in a white light that protects you and lets you be outside. Try it sometime. And watch your breathing when it is near you. Breathe slowly and deeply, relax. (Unknown)

Answer 2
thank you for your answer, it is certainly useful:) when I go to him I am fairly calm, but when I am there my heart rages. recently I was shaking the pan too, and this week I had a fight with him through the chat because of an incident. What I find particularly unfortunate is the incredible differences between us, when I am in a cuddle for example, he shuts himself off, then again upset and shut me down. I also feel resistance because his wife is there, and it seems as if he blames me for everything. But when I see him he pulls me enormously and he (by his wife) cannot complete. He looks around to see if anyone sees or notices something. He has often told him the truth or at least my truth, and sometimes has a shit. I just want to be open and honest, and to be in love, but sometimes it can be simply not.