Unknown

I met him perhaps 15 years ago at a yoga festival. I did not recognize him directly as a twinflame, I do not know whether that is true, I am curious about that. I saw no recognition in him, in fact, he made no contact, really with few people really, while he still “gave” mantra singing. The first dream I had about him was that he was lost in Amsterdam, on the lower shore. It was also in the street where he runs a restaurant. I was fascinated by him from the start and visited him, but received little response.Eventually (I had meanwhile husband and two children, almost divorced, tried again), I knew him quite well as a friend of nightlife, I sang with him one night and made love but without being exposed and kissing. That was nice. His dog had led him to me (it was at a festival) and he said that I hit him in places he did not know yet and that he had never “fucked dry” so well (sorry for this ugly word). The point is: I have dreamed about him twenty times intensively and vividly and the things he does (progressive with art, food, spirituality) really appeal to me. I also feel worried about him (he uses too many drugs) and dream that I want to help him and love him very much.I told him and he replied that he didn’t want anything with me. That’s embarrassing, and I don’t get it, because he finds me attractive. I think he’s too scared of the confrontation (I’m not so much into drugs) and a little scared. But maybe that is wishfull thinking and it just doesn’t really fall on me. But he is a very fan of mine (I am an artist) and wants to work with me. I don’t know what kind of relationship I want with him, it’s tiring. I’m just in love with half a fake guru junkie. Every time I think: line under it, gone with it, I dream intensely again. And I have that with no one else in this life. I think at least we come from some kind of soul group and we can very well merge our life missions, but he doesn’t see that. Unfortunately.If anyone can say something sensible about this? Oh yes … one day I asked a friend to put online tarot for me, and what happened: exactly at 11:11 am he asked (that friend): say a number (I don’t think and didn’t know what time it was) and I say; 11! The question was about this love. The card was Knight of Chalices. Incomprehensible – who can tell me how I can know what is true ??