Q1205. By marriage soul love?


That this is not an ordinary crush is evident from the fact that after 18 years I am still just as deeply in love or perhaps even more in love than at the beginning. He has been in my life for a long time as my brother-in-law, my husband’s brother. And from the start we got along very well. I quickly fell in love with him and now, after almost 20 years, I still am. Nobody knows, may know. Because there is a very heavy taboo on it. The world is highly betrayed, this is impossible and highly reprehensible. Everyone would fall over me if I would discuss this and so I wisely shut up. What should I say too? That I have lost my heart to the brother of the man to whom I have promised eternal loyalty? Nothing has ever happened between him and me and I know it won’t happen because we both love my husband.
Most of the time I am good at living with these feelings and I am happy that he is in my life. That we know each other so well and that I get energy from the moments that I see him. He doesn’t know, at least, I never told him. But I think he feels the same way. He has sometimes given hints in that direction and also noted that he experiences this as impossible. We are both stuck and sometimes it causes painful frustration. I feel him remotely, I meet him in dreams, I meet him in real life and then I feel the energy dancing between us. His eyes speak volumes. I don’t know how to proceed, we just live day after day, not even unhappy with our lives. But together we would be complete, with him I could live anywhere.
I think we should be patient until the next life, or until I will be free again. But that means that there will be a lot of grief first and I am not looking forward to that. I take it day by day, we’ll see what the universe has come up with for us. I am confident that it is going as it should be. I cannot share this with anyone so I am very happy that there are ways in this time to be able to say it anonymously. Because sometimes it is stifling. That he is my twinflame is 100% sure, I have no doubt about that. Why we have to meet each other in this life and find ourselves in such an impossible situation, I have no answer. It is difficult. Question: Are there more people who have a soul love that is your sister-in-law or brother-in-law? And how do you deal with that?