S264. It is ‘coming home’ in each other


I met my soul love when I was 17 years old. My parents discovered that I had made secret debts and had to go to work. That was in the hospitality industry and I was a waitress, he a cook. We immediately got along well. However, he was fired or something, but he wanted to keep in contact with me. He was wandering, he occasionally stood at my door (then still lived with my parents) and we sent each other cards, I to different addresses.

He was my first, so to speak, but it was not the most ideal situation / picture. As a result, he was so upset that he did not hear from him again. I sent him an angry letter out of grief.

We are now 21 years later and I have met him again in the strangest situations / in the strangest locations, even in my own house when I was still living with another man! It is a long story, but it was not allowed (yet) then. In the meantime, he met another woman (including his youth) and had a child ..

In August 2007 I visited him via Hyves and sent him a message. He responded half a year later when he was free from the other woman. However, enormous fear of attachment, partly due to his youth, but overwhelmed by me ..

And as it turns out … in 2009 I am going to work in a boarding school for homeless youngsters, of which he was one of the first residents (1994). I still can’t get over that ..

What I could not deal with is that he could no longer make himself heard … killing! That’s why I ended the relationship, but was in a lot of pain and sorrow.

In 2010 he felt so bad about himself, partly because he could not succeed socially, that I advised him to go to his emigrated family on Tenerife, his roots. He finally did that and he is still there.

We have contact, but I miss him terribly. He also misses me, so his sense of happiness on Tenerife is not complete. I have heard that he is my twinflame and that is how he / she feels. I’m the one he wants to feel comfortable with, it’s coming home together.

I have never had such an intense sexual experience with a man as with him and it is completely mutual. All this long-lasting tenderness and selflessness while he was my first … unbelievable!

For me it is a feeling of soul love: coming home, being able to be myself, having the same interests and certain opinions about things. Even the same appearance. Not having him physically with me, being in the neighborhood is pain, missing ..

It eats me not to know where we are going. Are we going to end up being happy with the two of us? My feeling says yes, I think so. But when, patience is my greatest lesson in life, so difficult, that uncertainty, in combination with its huge damage ..

I thought with other men, I did my best to forget him, but it wasn’t them, forget it! I literally love this man, for who he is, such a sweetheart! It is difficult to want to continue without him .. blood crawls where it cannot go .. No reason, only feeling with love ..

I am curious about similar stories from fellow sufferers. Read many stories of impossible loves for whatever reason and that makes me dull / discouraged. Love success stories, like in my work ..

My tips: Keep in touch, stay with your feelings and tell this .. your soul love will understand this, he / she will experience the same thing. It is determined by the universe, to learn from, but also to be together through all difficulties. You must both want to overcome those difficulties in order to be together.