S199. I saw his essence


He was at my house and suddenly I felt an energy coming from outside to my heart. Then I knew it is him, he will be my husband. I was at his house once before and suddenly he said this was arranged by god. I was shocked that I thought it was strange.

When that energy hit me in my heart I became hyper. I think he was shocked then. He asked if I was in love with him, I said no. Once after that I was at his house and very strange but suddenly I saw god in his eyes. I saw its essence . We also looked at each other and it was so intense that I lowered my eyes or that he lowered his eyes. Once I made a joke and he really laughs twice as much as I have never experienced that someone laughed at me like that from my toes, I thought it was wonderful. Once again I laughed loudly and then he looked at me and his eyes lit up and beamed so beautifully how he looked at me.

I have never had a relationship with him I would like to but he does not want he does not want to talk about it. He once said that he is not afraid of any woman but of me. It has now been about 3 years since I met him and in those three years I have seen him only a few times. Once he wanted to talk to me and asked how I would see the future if we started something, I was so shocked that I felt my energy withdraw.

I have occasional telephone contact with him, he never calls me I call him I also write him many e-mails and so on but he does not respond.

I now know what true love is . The love I feel for him is unconditional, I love him as much as I love my children.
I believe that there is only one and that is he
I find it difficult that he closes himself off to me, I feel alone, even though I find it difficult to go for it